Sexy Urban Legends: Masked Marauders (2001)

 

Season 1 Episode 2 of Sexy Urban Legends: The two tales are "Halloween Party" and "Cybersex"

Sexy Urban Legends: Things That Go Bump in the Night (2002)

 

Season 2 Episode 1 of Sexy Urban Legends. The two tales are "Vanishing Hitchhiker" and "Dirty Deeds" 

Nerone (1977)

 

An absolutely insane telling of the Emperor Nero story, complete with disco tunes and gratuitous nudity. 

Bloodlust Zombies (2011)

 

A zombie movie.  The opening scene in the Dawn of the Dead remake will remain as one of the best (IMHO the best) moments in zombie movie history. It captures the horror of that moment when the world turns better than anything I've ever seen.  Suffice it to say, this ain't that film. It's just another B-movie about zombies, told with tongue planted firmly in cheek.

Devilish Education (1995)

 

(Original Title: Der Teufel und die Jungfrau - The Devil and the Virgin) A short German film about a virginal maiden seduced by the devil.

Lullaby of Bareland (1964)

 

A nudie cutie in two acts.  A husband and wife go off on their own adventures one Saturday.  Each thinks the other is doing something boring like playing bridge.  In actuality, the husband goes to a strip club and the wife goes to a nudist camp.

Secret Needs (2001)

 

As far as these dime-a-dozen straight-to-DVD or late-night-cable flicks go, this is one of the more erotic examples of the genre. 

Illusions of Sin (1997)

 

Elizabeth is a much abused understudy who has the added annoyance of being stalked by a madman.

As Mulheres Que Fazem Diferente (1974)

 

(Translation: Women Who Do Different) An anthology from Brazil consisting of a couple unrelated sex comedies. 

Sweet Hot Lisa (1980)

 

(Original Title: Dolce calda Lisa) Lisa is a young woman married to an older fat slob.  She cheats on him with a decadent group of rich perverts, abandoning her frumpy but loving husband. But is there any future in that lifestyle?

Downtown (1975)

 

(Original Title: Downtown - Die nackten Puppen der Unterwelt) A Jesús Franco film about little more than crotch shots. I mean there's a story here somewhere, but, yeah, it's pretty much just Franco zooming in "downtown" on his leading leadies.

Sheer Passion (1998)

 

An erotic thriller about a private investigator who goes undercover to collect clues to the murder of a model.

Beast in Space (1980)

 

An erotic science fiction film from Italy about a space crew in search of a precious material who land on a planet where they are possessed by a powerful computer.

Vampire Journals (1997)

 

A vampire hunter (who's also a vampire himself) takes on a Lestat-type and tries to save a young pianist from becoming like him.

Waidmannsheil im Spitzenhöschen (1982)

 

A girl runs away from home and winds up working at an old castle which she helps convert into a thriving hunting school - where youth come to learn how to catch game (and STDs).

Ready for Anything (1977)

 

(Original Title; Disposta A Tutto) A Last Tango in Paris wannabe.  Densely packed with nudity, but the story is barely watchable.  

One Million AC/DC (1969)

 

An Ed Wood Jr. caveman sex movie - how can we resist?  

That Malicious Age (1975)

 

(Original Title: Quella età maliziosa) A man tired of his miserable life in the city goes to work as a gardener on a remote villa on the Island of Elba. There, he gets wrapped up in the eccentric life of a widow and her hot daughter.

Classe Mista (1976)

 

An Italian sex comedy with the great Dagmar Lassander in the role usually reserved for Edwige Fenech as the new sexy teacher lusted after by the students.

Girls Will Be Girls (1980)

 

(Original Title: La settimana bianca) An Italian comedy about a Roman business which sends its employees to a San Sicario ski resort.  All the horny businessmen fawn over the hot employee, Anna Maria Rizzoli and get in trouble philandering with the nympho maid Carmen Russo.

Special Request (1984)

At first glance, looks like just a fetish video.  But it stars Michelle Bauer, and would you believe also 

Barbara Peckinpaugh? Bauer arguably the greatest Scream Queen of all time, and Peckinpaugh, whose life was cut short, but definitely made the most of it (see the Kevin Costner slasher Shadows Run Black, Roller Blade, Get Crazy, and other cult movie gems). 

Die Klosterschülerinnen (1972)

 

(AKA Sex Life in a Convent) A Schulmädchen-Report styled film which takes place at St. Margarethen convent school.  So, of course, we're in for tons of nudity, but perhaps even better - a soundtrack by  Giorgio Moroder.  What the hell?  Just a few years away from "I Feel Love" and the Sparks album.

Bedside Sailors (1976)

 

(Original Title: Sømænd på sengekanten) The last in the Danish "Bedside" (Mazurka) series.  The Danish sex comedies (Mazurka and the Astrology collection) have always been a point of fascination. They were what we dreamed porno would be in the US: big budget, well made, starring legitimate stars of the day, and could stand on their own without the sex. 

Temptations (1999)

 

On one hand, it's your standard late-night-cable steamy romance.  On the other, it feels like a Mexican soap opera with graphic softcore sex.  It's hard to explain, but this could easily fit in on the Univision daytime as "Rancho Holloway" minus the sex. And speaking of the sex - this one gets as close to hardcore as you can probably get at times.  But I get ahead of myself...

Feuchte Träume junger Frauen (1973)

 

A conman goes from woman to woman, having sex with them, swindling away their savings accounts, then leaving them high and dry.  A bumbling private detective is hired to track this Casanova conman to justice.

Mädchen die am Wege liegen (1976)

 

A socially awkward virgin goes on a road trip with his promiscuous friend. Along the way the cross paths with sexy hitchhikers, rich lesbians and a violent sadist. 

The Fabulous Bastard from Chicago (1969)

 

In the wake of  Bonnie and Clyde (1967). there were a bunch of ripoffs cashing in on the trend. It was only a matter of time before our boy David F. Friedman would use it as a template to show skin.  Featuring Bambi Allen getting raped with a Gherkin. 

Blackmail (1974)

 

(Original Title: Lo strano ricatto di una ragazza perbene) A rich stoner girl tricks her father into thinking she's been kidnapped in order to get the ransom money.  So, yeah, there's nothing whatsoever about blackmail in this movie.  I should have been called "Ransom".... but whatever.

School of Love (1969)

 

Not much more here than a stag film, but it features the great Monica Gayle, so definitely worth a look.  The "story" concerns a young couple who are having marital problems, and so enroll in the "school of love" to get their romance back on track.

Crime and Passion (1999)

 

A miserably awful movie about the daughter of a drug cartel kingpin who is kidnapped.  The crime boss sends his top hitman to retrieve her. 

Los Caraduros (1983)

 

A rare example of Antonio Ozores getting behind the camera (he hadn't done it since 1969 and never would again).  The film is a parody of a real event: the government expropriation of the José María Ruiz-Mateos Sociedad Anónima (Rumasa) holding company in 1982 (I'll let you read the Wikipedia page for yourself, and leave it at that). Ozores hams up the idea of three old losers who want to take advantage of the government bailout to enrich themselves.  Sound familiar, fellow americans?

House on Hooter Hill (2007)

 

A group of big breasted women gather for the reading of a murdered woman's will.  One of them is her killer - but who?

Dream Witch (2000)

 

A nerdy girl comes under the spell of the sexy Dream Witch, turning her from a socially awkward virgin into an insatiable slut.  

I Prosseneti (1976)

 

A nihilistic Italian film about an aristocrat couple who create a "Fantasy Island" for perverts - where rich men come to have their unwholesome desires fulfilled, no matter how strange or elaborate.

Quella Provincia Maliziosa (1975)

 

A wealthy conservative family is thrown for a loop when a sexually open girl is brought into their fold.

Lilian (la virgen pervertida) (1984)

 

A Jesús Franco cheap-o flick (even by Franco standards) about a young girl who gets lured into being a rich guy's sex slave.  

Nude Nurses 2 (1994)

 

Nude Nurses (1993) was evidently popular enough to spawn a sequel. In fact, Bob Scott Productions (BSP) released a whole series of these modern day versions of the 1960s  "nudie cutie" featuring a variety of uniformed ladies (teachers, lawyers, nurses, etc.). There's not much to them, but a worth a glance in the history of sexploitation productions. 

Heidi's House: Upstairs (1996)

 

On VZ1, we've covered theatrical releases, late-night cable movies, straight to VHS,.. but this is a first - a CD-ROM movie.  It's tiny blip in sexploitation, but worth a look nonetheless.

Cannibal Hookers (1987)

 

There were a ton of cheap SOV sexy horror flicks that filled the video shelves in the late eighties.  This is similar to Night of the Living Babes from the same year in style and self-aware camp.  I could watch these damn things all day.  Unless you watch this, it may not make sense, but the best way I can describe this is if HG Lewis made movies in the eighties as he did in the sixties. Just a ton of fun.

Cannibal Terror (1981)

 

The French get in on the cannibal film gravy train with a story about kidnappers who tread too deeply into the jungle.

Intimo profondo (1989)

 

An Italian film about a couple who cheat on each other when their marriage grows stale.

Lolida 2000 (1998)

 

Jacqueline Lovell hosts an anthology trio of sci-fi erotica stories. This has nothing whatsoever to do with the Nabokov novel, not even tangentially. 

Overnight Models (1973)

 

(Original Title: Jagd auf Jungfrauen) A German sex comedy about a tour bus full of tourists in Berlin who get into various sexual situations.

Calmos (1976)

 

A French film that gets progressively more and more insane as it goes along.  Starting with a gynecologist who wants to take a break from women - and ending with him literally going inside a woman's vagina.  It's hard to explain...

The Layout (1969)

 

Joseph W. Sarno delivers his usual dialog-driven slow-paced sexual drama fit for the stage... but ends with a thirty minute orgy with cordless "massagers".

Unlucky Charms (2013)

 

A Full Moon flick about five ladies competing to be a lingerie spokeswoman.  The host of the reality show contest uses a charm bracelet to summon mythical creatures to kill the models in order to retain her youth.

Taxi Dancers (1994)

 

Spoiler alert, one of the worst movies I've ever seen.  First of all, a movie about taxi dancers... really?  If you don't know what they are - they are employed at dance halls/cabarets and get paid to dance.  It was popular in the early 20th century, but has largely died out.  There were a million movies which chronicled the lives of strippers during the nineties, so maybe they wanted to be different.... well it's different alright, in the worst ways imaginable. 

Evil Ambitions (1996)

 

The owner of a modeling agency is actually the leader of a satanic cult.  A tabloid reporter sets out to solve a murder connected to the cult.

The Amorous Adventures of Don Quixote and Sancho Panza (1976)

 

They had a habit in the seventies of wanting to turn fairy tales and famous stories (Robin Hood, Boccaccio, etc.) into bawdy movies. Here, Cervantes gets the sexual revolution treatment.

La Zorrita en Bikini (1976)

 

A Spanish comedy starring the great Esperanza Roy as the "little fox in a bikini" who lures a perpetually horny guy into jewel heist.