Dec 18, 2024

Witchcraft VI (1994)



In this, the sixth installment of the Witchcraft series, we continue the further adventures of Spanner as he tackles a serial killer, Satan's Agent, and a succubus. Lookout for one of the best bathtub scenes in nineties straight-to-video history. Generally regarded as the worst in the series - I would beg to differ.









































CHARACTER
RATING: ★★★★★★★★★☆ 9/10

REVIEW: [10/04/20] This film seems to be unanimously regarded as the worst in the series - where it hits rock bottom. Never so clearly can we see the disparity between "your average movie watcher" and VZ1 (and exploitation cinemaphiles). I think hitting rock bottom is a good thing for an exploitation film; they certainly understood that in the seventies. The films playing at the Deuce were proud to be hitting rock bottom - they reveled in it, and tried to see if that bottom couldn't be dug a little deeper. So, out of spite for those assholes reviewers who don't understand that exploitation films need to be understood as such, I'm going to award this nine fucking stars. Kiss my ass.

SECOND SPIN: [12/18/24] Upon re-watch I stand by my nine star rating: in fact, I had half a mind to bump it up to a tenner. The first five films were so abysmal that this film deserves special kudos for waking this series up, and going headlong into good sleazy fun. And my god did Debra K. Beatty earn her paycheck for this one. [insert wolf whistle here]


SYNOPSIS

The movie begins with a car trunk opened to reveal a dead nude woman (Stephanie Champlin). A serial killer named Jonathan (Craig Stepp) carries her body for disposal. Detectives Lutz (Kurt Alan) and Garner (John E. Holiday) are on the case. Johnathan meets a lovely blonde named Mary (Stephanie Swinney) at a diner. She goes home with him. Johnathan admires her upskirt as she peeks into the fridge. They have sex on the kitchen floor. Then he breaks out a hypodermic needle and kills her. He carries Mary to the trunk of his car. Waiting for him in the driver's seat is Cat (Shannon McLeod). The celebrate his second murder of the night.

Lutz and Garner put together clues in the most annoying fashion possible. Will Spanner (Jerry Spicer) and Keli (Debra K. Beatty) are startled by a knock at the door. He finds Detectives Lutz and Garner at his door. They are here to request his services to help solve the case. Spanner is taken to the morgue to view the body of Mary. Spanner, being the son of a powerful warlock, is able to sense Mary's last moments alive. He knows she's a victim of a satanic murder. [I love how, in this really long scene, Garner keeps putting his hand all around Mary's bush - like he didn't think we'd notice what he's up to. Pretty slick John E. Holiday, but we see you.]

We meet Satan's Agent, Savanti (Bryan Nutter). Cat is his personal satanic assistant. Savanti noticed Spanner at the police station, and picked up on his warlock vibes. He wants Cat to lure him in. So, Cat poses as a divorcee requesting the services of Attorney Spanner. Spanner comes home to find Keli waiting for him in the bathtub. Spanner jumps in and they have sex in the tub. Johnathan has found another victim. A random woman walking along a deserted street. [She's not listed in the credits - but that's Maureen Flaherty! The credits list Priscilla Huddberry, but that's got to be her alias. I'd recognize Flaherty's rbf anywhere.] She's made a ritual sacrifice, but Savanti gets pissed when he finds out that the girl isn't a virgin. Cat visits Spanner in his office. They have sex on his office desk, but it turns out to be a hallucination. Cat has spiked his drink. Diana (Jennifer Bransford) is Spanner's secretary. We learn that Diana is a virgin. As you might imagine, that will become important.

Spanner knows Savanti is behind all this, and meets with him at a goth martini bar. Lutz and Garner have been taken off the case, and now it's all up to him to bring the Satan's Agent to justice. Johnathan and Cat roll up to Spanner's apartment. Keli is taking a bath. [Yes, Debra K. Beatty has once again blessed us with a bathtub scene.] Keli hears Johnathan break in. She's able to ward him off with a knife. Spanner arrives, but Johnathan is long gone. Johnathan and Cat have sex on the hood of her car. Diana the virgin is laid on the satanic altar. Spanner comes to the rescue, but Cat seduces him. Spanner bludgeons Cat in the stomach, killing her. Spanner then runs to Diana. Spanner is able to summon his warlock superpowers and defeats Savanti. THE END

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