Tarzeena: Jiggle in the Jungle (2008)





A Fred Olen Ray take on the Tarzan movie, with Christine Nguyen in the titular role.


































CHARACTERS
RATING: ☆☆☆☆☆ 5/10

REVIEW: I've compared Fred Olen Ray's Retromedia films as sexploitation fast food. They provide about what you expect, but are ultimately just forgettable junk. All that being said, I will never not watch them, so I guess I can't slam them too much.

DOUBLE FEATURE - Rana, Queen of the Amazon (1994)



SYNOPSIS

One with nature, Tarzeena (Christine Nguyen) showers in a waterfall. Ted (Voodoo) and Mandy (Nicole Sheridan) have just come from Uncle Milton's funeral. But Mandy isn't really the dead man's niece. She's an imposter out to collect his inheritance. The two con artists celebrate with sex. The arrival of Jed Slater (Ed Polgardy) from "the firm that represented old man Milton". He informs Mandy that the inheritance should first go to Uncle Milton's son Bradley; however, years ago his plane crashed on "Kong Island". He and his daughter are believed to be dead. He says, "You can have the money if and only if you go on a safari to Kong Island and make an earnest effort to find Milton's Bradley." On Kong Island there are rumors of a "white goddess" who could be Bradley's daughter.

Jack Carver (Evan Stone) will be their safari guide on Kong Island. Shana (Syren) is Jack's woman. Ted, Mandy and Jed land on Kong Island. Tarzeena notices their arrival from afar. Shana is the lab assistant for Dr. Mortimer (Michael Gaglio) who is conducting brain control experiments on the island. Mandy has sex with Jack. Mandy is attacked by Tabonga the gorilla. Jack nearly kills it; Ted and Jed urge him to hold back. Tarzeena saves Mandy. Mortimer tranquilizes the gorilla and takes it to his lab. He plants a computer chip in the gorilla's brain which will allow him to control the ape. Tarzeena has sex with Ted. Mandy is asleep in the other room. Shana seduces Mandy.

Tarzeena is captured by Mortimer to have his chip implanted. He says,"I am a little embarrassed that I'm using what could be easily considered a world altering scientific achievement for something as cheap and sleazy as getting laid." Tarzeena is about to be operated on when the gang rescues her. They escape and leave a pack of dynamite behind to blow the lab up. On the way out, they are waylaid by Mortimer. But are saved when Tabonga attacks Mortimer. The lab explodes. Mandy and Ted celebrate - they receive Uncle Milton's inheritance. And they make Tarzeena their maid. THE END

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