Sep 21, 2021

Los Caraduros (1983)


A rare example of Antonio Ozores getting behind the camera (he hadn't done it since 1969 and never would again).  The film is a parody of a real event: the government expropriation of the José María Ruiz-Mateos Sociedad Anónima (Rumasa) holding company in 1982 (I'll let you read the Wikipedia page for yourself, and leave it at that). Ozores hams up the idea of three old losers who want to take advantage of the government bailout to enrich themselves.  Sound familiar, fellow americans?

This is the story of three friends:Alberto Ruiz (Antonio Ozores), José María (Raúl Sender) and Mateo (Juanito Navarro)

Alberto is a bachelor living with his father and maid (María Isbert).

He runs a restaurant with an Ottoman Empire theme, complete with topless Odalisque waitresses.

Lucía Peralta as an Odalisque (i.e. Turkish sultan's harem girl)

A cameo from Andrés Pajares and Fernando Esteso as patrons of the restaurant. 

Alberto falls down the stairs.  Things just aren't going well for him, and he's not getting any younger.

Speaking of getting old, Mateo and his wife Elvira (Helga Liné) live a full of stress and struggle.

Of course, this comes with having a ton of kids.

Mateo runs a tanning bed business... full of totally naked customers he happily checks on.

Mateo checks on the next fully nude customer.

Susan Hayward delivers some serious full frontal nudity.

A male customer has an unusual tan pattern.  (insert laugh track)

Looking at naked women all day; Mateo is ready to let off some sexual steam.

Elvira is ready to help out in that regard.

But every single time they get started one of their damned kids interrupts. 

José works at a women's clothing store with Fermina (Emma Ozores)

José has the misfortune of helping a psycho customer, Amparo (? actress).

He doesn't quite know how to handle this; José is clearly gay.

José has Amparo over for dinner.

She wastes no time...

José is frozen.

Amparo attempts to forcefully seduce him, but he doesn't swing that way.

Amparo is astonished at his unwillingness.

The actress playing Amparo is very familiar, but I can't identify her.  Whoever she is, she's quite the trooper for acting in this long scene half-naked.

José's mother (Mari Carmen Prendes) enters and her reaction is not what you'd expect.

Amparo only can stand there so long before she grabs her clothes and leaves.

Alberto's comically horny father (Emilio Fornet) has brought home a Hawaiian themed whore named Miss Biondi (Maika Grey).
While papa snoozes Alberto tries to have sex with her, but the maid sleepwalks.

Alberto, José and Mateo have dinner - and, yes, the waitresses are nude.

After a failed attempt at jogging, Alberto finds the answer to their woes in the newspaper.

The aforementioned government buyout of Rumasa has been announced. 

The three amigos get the bright idea to create their own holding company (called Mosca) which includes their businesses - in the hopes of getting that hefty government bail out. They make the news.

"It seems that the government is going to continue the expropriations. Now it's the Mosca holding company."

The climactic scene is set in motion as Alberto checks in to a hotel with his Odalisque (Lucía Peralta). 

In disguise, Mateo also checks in. 

This family man can't afford to be detected.  "Mi llamo Ronald Reagan," he says to the clerk.  Julita (Lourdes Sierra) accompanies him.

José comes dressed like Carmen Miranda.

The party begins.

Unexpected guests arrive....

Carmen Carrión dressed as a dominatrix!

She's with a diminutive client (Fabián Conde) who quakes in fear. 

And look who's arrived - it's Amparo!  And this time she has the cure to getting with José - she's dressed as a man.

Mateo finally lets his hair down (figuratively) and fools around with Alberto's Odalisque.

But just then Elvira walks in!

Mateo passes out and the gang carries him to the bedroom.

With José with Amparo and Mateo with his wife, that leaves all the remaining ladies for Alberto. But then his father arrives...

The ladies' man.

Fermina is also here.  Emma Ozores was in all these movies (obviously because of daddy Ozores); she never had a leading part (or even a relevant one) as far as I've seen.

The dominatrix and her midget return. 

Things escalate and escalate until they finally end with....

...a literal dog fart. THE END

I remember seeing Peter Sellers' The Party and thinking it was so funny until things escalated into the climactic chaos at the end, with painted elephants and all. A ton of films follow this pattern - to not be able to resolve the comedic situation and so rely on just escalating layers of chaos. Can't tie up all the moving parts in your comedy of errors? No problem - just have a dominatrix with a midget, a dog fart and mounds of incomprehensible chaos. 

But its greatest sin is that the "plot" doesn't even get hinted at until the halfway mark - and even then, it's promptly jettisoned in favor of pointless tomfoolery.  It's redeeming qualities are talent Ozores brings to the table, the boundless energy and more-than-ample amounts of T&A. 


1 comment:

  1. But but where do you watch all these movies? Could you give us any link so that we all can enjoy them