Mar 7, 2021

Soft Honey, Very Soft (1978)


(Original Title: Suave, cariño, muy suave) A door-to-door cosmetics salesman becomes the boy toy for a gaggle of rich women in this Spanish comedy. 

Luis (Andrés García) is a mild mannered salesman who sits agape at a beautiful woman at the foot of his bed.

Eva (Nadiuska) dances naked.

I'm not sure I've seen Nadiuska do full frontal before.  I'll have to look back at her other films reviewed on VZ1.

Suddenly Eva is covered with facial cream and we realize it's just the fantasy of a cosmetics salesman.

Eva is a celebrity, and Luis is a tad obsessed with her.

One day, the computer punch card given to Luis for his door-to-door route leads him to Eva's house.  He's so smitten, he drops his briefcase on her foot.

To Luis' delight, Eva invites him in.

A nip slip here and there is more than poor Luis can handle.

On the phone, Luis catches a glimpse of Eva's bare ass.

Outside, she tries some of Luis' lotion - while he gentlemanly looks the other way.

On his way out, he hits a girl named Patricia (Violeta Cela) on her bike.

This happenstance gets him linked to her mother...

Patricia's parents: Ana (Kitty de Hoyos) and Alfredo (Javier Escrivá)

Hilariously, Alfredo likes to read porno magazines whilst groping his woman.  It's sort-of his thing.  Ana just rolls her eyes and puts up with it.

Eva takes a big hit from a joint.

Luis arrives at a very opportune moment.  Eva and her stoned friends all pounce on the salesman.

The next morning when the smoke clears, Luis awakens and rushes off to work.

He demonstrates his cosmetics to the local rich ladies.

Patricia's mother: Ana (Kitty de Hoyos), is there - and she's turned on by Luis.  Stuck with lame (but rich) Alfredo all these years - she's yearning for a "real man".
Eva is talking ont he phone.  As a finger slowly approaches her nipple, we suspect it may be who we think it is beside her...

Yep.  It's Ana's rich husband, Alredo (going by the name Enrique with Eva), who's up to his old tricks, grabbing Eva while he reads a skin magazine.

Turns out, Alfredo is giving Eva the finer things in life as his side-action.

Ana desperately wants a piece of Luis.

So does another neighbor, Irene (Mirta Miller).

Irene is alarmed by the sound of her husband coming home.  She jumps out of bed.

Brief nudity from Mirta Miller as she quickly gets dressed.

Ana continues to lay it on thick with Luis.

They have sex - but sadly no nudity from Kitty de Hoyos

But the same is not true of her daughter - Patricia (Violeta Cela)

She takes Luis up to her bedroom.

She has Mao and Che posters in her room.

They fall asleep after sex.

Patricia hears Ana return home.

A long scene wherein Luis tries to escape undetected by Ana involving lots of close-calls and frantic tomfoolery.

And so, Luis ends up with his dream girl and things wind up as boring and predictable as you'd imagine. THE END

Fairly forgettable and lazy.  There really needs to be more than just the idea that Luis is getting involved with a few rich ladies.... it definitely needs something to zest up this tired and lame story.  Nadiusky is always a hottie, and provides full frontal right outta the gate; but it's all downhill from there.


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