Gatta alla pari (1994)

 

An Italian film featuring Malù which is about a group of people having sex in a big house, and not much more than that.

Roger (Carlo Macaro) secretly watches his fiance through the window.

Nancy (Cristina Barsacchi) is, all by herself, getting aroused by a slideshow of bodybuilders.  She dances around naked.

Nancy's mother comes at Roger with a pair of hedge clippers.

Suria (Tracy Kelly) pretends to chop his dick off, then winks at the camera before sucking his dick.  Yeah, she's giving her future son-in-law a blow job.

Baby Ryan (Malù) arrives at the estate.

Watching her get out of her car is a thing of beauty.

She can't get in through the door, so she tries to scale the wall.

Of course this just gives an opportunity for us to watch Malù climb in a short skirt.

She gets inside and stands beside Frank (Alex Damiani), the bodyguard.

Frank and Baby already have had a thing going.

Frank also has a thing going with Suria.

Suria pulls up her dress.

They have sex.

James (Antonio Zequila) is Suria's husband. The maid Cora (Valeria Favaro) offers to give him a blow job.

 

As he's getting a blow job, he looks up and finds that his secretary (Catherine Stone) is in the room with him. 

She lifts her skirt and lets him look while he's getting his dick serviced.

'Cause that's normal right?  Happens all the time.

Baby is hit by their car.

She's transported back unconscious, with Roger getting his face all up in her crotch as he struggles to get her situated in the backseat.

Baby gets to know Nancy and Suria, and begins work as an au pair.

She's given a guest room where she promptly gets undressed.

Time for a sauna.

James admires the new hire through the sauna window.

They get into a fight.  James wants to fool around, but she refuses.  How can this be?  Every other female in this house eagerly jumps his bones.

Gratuitous crotch shot.

Baby knees James in the nuts, then collapses on the bed sobbing.

James spends the night having surreal fantasies about Baby.

Baby hops in bed with Suria and Frank.

At long last, Nancy jumps on Roger and they have sex.

Everyone confronts James in the end, in silliest way imaginable.  Turns out, Baby is actually James' younger sister, blah, blah, blah.

Insanely sexy... but also insanely stupid.  I mean, Skinamax movies were similarly threadbare in the plot department, but the paper-thin plot at least made sense.  This was just ridiculous. 

★★★★☆☆☆☆☆☆4/10