Aug 3, 2020

Erotic Inferno (1975)

(AKA Adam & Nicole) This British sexploitation flick has become a bit infamous for a number of reasons.  First, it was notably viewed by moral reformer Lord Longford in order to gain first hand experience of sex films, so that he could then morally condemn them.  Second, the making of this film was documented in an episode of the BBC's Man Alive series.  There, we learn a lot of interesting things first hand about, not only the making of this picture, but of adult filmmaking in general. Lastly, it features Mary Millington, and we know that any film featuring this tragic figure is always of keen interest to sleazy cinemaphiles. 

 Adam (Michael Watkins) is a servant for Old Mr. Barnard who, he's informed, has just died in a boating accident.

 Monika Ringwald makes a quick appearance as his lay.

Adam learns that there will be a reading of the will; however, no one is allowed into Old Mr. Barnard's mansion until that day comes.

Adam is convinced he'll get the inheritance.  Old Mr. Barnard always said he'd give it to him.

His girlfriend Nicole (Jennifer Westbrook) reminds him that he's not a blood relative.

Nicole is also a servant at Old Mr. Barnard's household.

Adam pours a drink on Nicole to wake her up for the funeral.

Also attending is Paul Barnard (Karl Lanchbury), Old Mr. Barnard's son.

 Martin Barnard (Christopher Chittell) is his other son.

 Brenda (Jeannie Collings) is Martin's woman.

Jeannie Collings provides some nudity as they engage in horseplay.  I have to say, there is a ton of sex in this film, but none of it is remotely erotic.

Brenda and Martin show up at the estate only to find that it's locked.  They'll have to stay at a nearby farmhouse.

 Brenda and Paul seem to have an attraction.

We also meet Gayle (Heather Deeley) and her lesbian lover Jane (Mary Millington) who are horsing around in the stable.

 They have sex in the hay.

 We find that Adam is a bit of a prick, and doesn't treat Nicole very well.

As per the estate's attorney, she must wear the key to Old Mr. Barnard's mansion around her waist. 

I'm going to just put this out there: no film in history has shown so many close-ups of a single woman's bush.  Every time we turn around, the guys are checking her bush to see if the key is still in place.  You could make this a drinking game and be plastered by the end of the film.

Martin shows up to have sex with Gayle, but she's with Jane.

 The ladies in this film are constantly out of their clothes.

 Gayle and Jane have sex.

 Easily the best sex scene in the film. (Which isn't saying much.)

Martin has sex with Nicole. 

 Adam catches Nicole in bed with Martin.

 He smacks her around for being a slut, then checks for the key.

 The reason these guys want the key so much is that they know Adam is actually the illegitimate son of Old Mr. Barnard. If he's able to get access to the house, he may find proof of his lineage and get the inheritance.  So, Paul and Martin can't allow that to happen.

 Paul shows up, also checking on the key.

 Martin has sex with Nicole again, and this time is able to get the key.

Adam smacks Brenda around and throws her in the tub for plotting against him.

 When Nicole walks in, he throws her in too.

 Adam leaves, and the ladies get out of their wet clothes.  You guess what comes next.

 Amid all the bed hopping, Martin is really beginning to fancy Nicole.

 Finally, the will is read.  We find that Old Mr. Barnard isn't actually dead. This was all a big gag to see how his three sons react to his death, and which will one day deserve his inheritance.

Old Mr. Barnard (Tony Kenyon) enjoys a toast with Martin.  He and Paul actually behaved the best under the circumstances.  Martin ends up with Nicole, and Paul with Brenda.  Adam ends up alone and pissed off.

This truly sucked; there is so much bed-hopping it's hard to keep straight who's shagging who.  As mentioned, the sex scenes are pretty awful (and with poor lighting, a pet peeve).  The one thing I liked was that, in any other film, the butler who doesn't realize he's actually the illegitimate son, would have ended up with the inheritance.  Instead, he ends up the asshole who gets nothing. 

Double Feature: There are so many inheritance movies to choose from.  Perhaps one of the most over-used plot devices of all time. The Naked Detective (1996) is a similarly silly and stupid reading-of-the-will movie, where the inheritance plot serves simply to provide a template to show sex scene after sex scene.

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