Murder-Set-Pieces (2004)



A photographer goes on a killing spree. Featuring cameos from Gunnar Hansen, Cerina Vincent, and Tony Todd.































CHARACTERS
RATING: ★★★★☆☆☆☆☆☆ 4/10

REVIEW: I wanted to watch this again, because my initial review on here (from 2019) was so scathing - like one of the worst movies ever reviewed on VZ1. Upon rewatch, I wasn't quite so stricken by its badness. I mean, it's not good. No question about that. It definitely feels like it's trying too hard. But other than that, it's just kinda forgettable and meh. I was either in a bad mood when I watched this the first time, or just tired of these self-aware films and reached my saturation point.

SYNOPSIS

The main character is a German called only The Photographer (Sven Garrett). We'll call him Sven. Sven is dating a hairdresser named Charlotte (Valerie Baber). Charlotte has a little sister named Jade (Jade Risser) who doesn't care too much for Sven. Turns out, she has cause for concern. Snooping around his house, she finds Nazi paraphernalia. He catches her and provides a weird explanation that only evokes more concern. Sven has sex in a Vegas hotel with two hookers. He pulls out a straight razor and slits the throat of one of the girls. Renee Baio is Scott Baio's wife. The other hooker (Lauren Palac) doesn't notice her colleague is dead, due to the poor lighting. But then she feels the blood. He proceeds to strangle her. Sven picks up a girl named Andrea (Andrea Mitchell) at a casino. She agrees to model for him. Back to the hotel room they go. Andrea is perhaps a bit too cute and innocent to kill; Sven manages to curb his violent impulses. The hooker (Christina Holsinger) he picks up next isn't quite so sweet and innocent. Sven grabs her and dunks her in the bathtub. [Christina Holsinger is quite the trooper to allow herself to get dunked like this; it looks like he's really drowning her. She was never in a movie after this... is she okay?] Sven visits a club and gets a personal dance from a stripper (Liv Holley). He takes home a different stripper (Sarah Murray). Next we see him pounding her... and simultaneously beating her to death. She dies before sex is even finished, but he keeps going.

Tony Todd plays an adult video store clerk. You can tell he's just in this for the paycheck; and I don't blame him. Gunnar Hansen also makes a cameo as a mechanic with a swastika in his living room. Again, you can tell he's here for the paycheck. Neither Todd nor Hansen have anything to do with this plot - they're here just so their name can be printed on the DVD box. Then we see Sven banging a girl (Destiny St. Claire) on a weight bench. Of course, she's covered in blood and he's simultaneously killing her. Next, Sven is taking pictures of two ladies: Jenna Velanni and Crissy Moran. Now the two models are stuck in his dungeon. Sven drives spikes through the arms of the blonde. Sven has the brunette (Crissy Moran) strung up nude by her ankles.

Periodically we get flashbacks of this girl on train tracks (LeAnn Clinton). She somehow ends up dead on the side of the tracks, and Sven discovers her. A doll is on her body... I suppose this is supposed to symbolize something? Sven kills Megan (Katie Richards), a friend of Jade's, and throws her body in a dumpster. Jade alerts her older sister, Charlotte, to her boyfriend's bad behavior - she said she saw Sven stalking her and Megan trick-or-treating. She has sex with Sven, then he throws her off. Charlotte is having second thoughts about Sven. There's a showdown between Jade and Sven in his basement of horrors. She escapes. THE END

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